Return of the Corvids

I'm the angel who plucked too many feathers out of her stupidly designed unaerodynamic wings due to a nervous habit and plummeted to earth.

And I'm the daemon who drank so much root beer and managed to giggle myself right up out of hell.

Today, we're your friendly neighborhood corvids...

RavenBlood and RavenBran!

But since neither heaven nor hell, nor angels nor daemons exist...

We don't actually exist either.

So you might want to take what we say with a grain of salt.

Welcome to this, our Statement of Porpoise. Raven, do they have porpoises at Sea World?

Uhhh...dunno Raven. Never gotten to feel around the dolphin tank to see for myself. I never saw the porpoise.

Oh. Well, anyway, instead of posting some lame crapman piece of bureaucratic bullcookies explaining why we are, we figured we'd do it this way. It's kind of like talking to us.

Except you don't get to ask us any annoying questions.

But we'll try and be helpful anyway. Raven, I'll let you handle this one. We're the Osceola Corvids. But I bet the folks are asking, what in Sam Hill is a corvid?

When did I become an orinthologist?

Raven bonks Raven on the head with a spherical cow and threatens to withdraw all sexual favors.

Okay, I give. Raven doesn't play fair. Anyway, porpoises are NOT corvids, so let's get that out of the way first. "Corvid" is a cutesy way of referring to the Corvidae family of birds. It's a big'un, too. But in the Osceola Corvids, we're principally concerned with two birds, the crow and the raven.

Why? Well, mostly because we feel a kind of affinity for these black birds. In the traditions of many cultures, these are creatures of magic, mysticism, and wisdom. Keep in mind that none of us think we're ACTUALLY the birds we favor--although having wings wouldn't be bad.

The subject, Raven.

Well tell me you wouldn't like to be able to fly?

At any rate, the Osceola Corvids are a bunch of creative and fun people who happen to identify with ravens and crows. Usually, a member will take a name for use among the murder (that's our equivalent of "flock") or for when acting as a member. You'll notice that we here are calling ourselves RavenBlood and RavenBran, and you probably deduced that these aren't our legal names. Uh, I hope you did.

Essentially we're all about friends getting together to be creative, express ourselves, and have a good time. Late night gatherings at various Denny's--
--they haven't tossed us out yet, and I applaud them for their tolerance--

--are a typical and frequent event. We're not hard to spot. We'll be the laughing crowd hidden in the back dressed, of course, in black.

The Eric Draven fashion is always popular--you know, the hero from the film, "The Crow" or the hero from the original graphic novel by James O'Barr? Of course no one thinks they ARE Draven, but it's fun to see what Crow statements people devise. The face paint is always popular, and many dress right down to PVC and electrical tape. Others wear their old but loved Crow t-shirts.

Even these two Ravens become Crows. It's not all make-up and costuming, though. We have people show up just as they are in everyday life, and that's fine too. Anything goes--but don't push us, because we do take that literally.
She's not kidding.

We also gather at The Nest, which is our own home. You'd be surprised. Very often we get into reading and/or philosophical discussions. Of course, we also get silly. A favorite activity is watching horror films or even "The Crow" for the millionth time, reciting along with the movie.

So who can become a Corvid? Well, usually we ask an interested person to hang with us and see if they feel at home with us. Interest is really the only requirement, although I prefer if new folks have a good sense of humor. There's no alcohol served at any Corvid function, but I still prefer members to be over the age of eighteen. Frankly, we may get into discussions of things or watch things deemed unsuitable for younger people, and we'd prefer not to get into a sticky entanglement with angry parents.

You understand.

I'm sure.


Pearls of Wisdom

"Well, DUH!"
"It's exactly the same, except almost completely different."
"This is a no-Zen zone for the next fifteen minutes."
"I'm king/queen of my cube!"
"NOT"
"Pro-Fucking-Choice!"
"Happiness is where you are, not where you'd like to be."
"AMAZON!"
"We need more people like us and fewer like them."
"If space and time are curved, then where do straight people come from?"
"Self-respect before respectability."
"We've been too nice for too long."
"That's not Spam, that's my husband."
"Silence is not protection."
"Oh, EVOLVE!"
"I love everybody and you're next."
"Unique, just like everybody else."
"Control your destiny or someone else will."
"Don't follow me, I'm following my bliss."
"Don't piss me off. I'm running out of places to hide the bodies."
"Don't start with me. You will not win."
"Eat right, exercise, die anyway."
"Your village called. The idiot is missing."
"Bubble wrap is cheaper than therapy."
"VEGETARIAN = Lousy hunter"
"So what about the speed of dark?"
"If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you."